"why burn your bridges when you can blow your bridges up?"

or in my case, blow them up and then try to rebuild them from the tiny little scraps, and then blow them up again and expect to still be able to cross them.

proverbial.

i am pleased at the reminder that i can live in easter sunday and not good friday. i think that as i get older (read "more bitter") i feel less certain of this. i feel less certain of who i was made to be, or at least less certain that that person is okay in the face of life's struggles and awkwardnesses and let downs. but today i remember that he is risen, and i am risen with him, and i have hope. happy easter.

i want to do this.
and this.
please somebody come play!

play ball

today was opening day. today was the beginning of my favorite season of the year--baseball season. today i wasn't even all that sad to be sick because it meant i got to stay home and watch the festivities and two full games. today i almost actually liked the mariners, now that ken griffey, jr. is back. he's just so darn likable...

it all began almost 3 years ago with a spur of the moment trip to cincinnati, a lovely day at the ballpark, a delicious root beer float, and a nice time with two delightful people. it was one of those days when life felt fun and simple and purely good. it is a day i think about more than i ever imagined i would at the time, a day that is very precious to me for so many reasons.
since then i have come a long way. now i study stats and watch espn and utter words like "wild card" and "southpaw." i have seen the white sox with michele, the mariners vs the reds with my dad, spring training with cara and dwayne... i have braved huge and unruly crowds of fans, overpayed for hot dogs and beer and cracker jacks, cheered and yelled and bonded with total strangers over unfair calls and great plays. and every time i feel the same way as i did at that first game 3 years ago.
i love it. i love it all. play ball.